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The 10 most important things I’ve learned throughout my life.

Life is all about lessons. We learn as long as we live. It’s the core of how we stay in movement, develop and unfold ourselves. I find myself grateful for every decision I’ve made, it’s consequences and the lessons that I’ve learned from them – both good and bad. It’s what has taken me on the path I am today. Some stick deeper then others of course, but I wanted to share the 10 most important things I’ve learned in life so far and maybe you will recognise some of these lessons yourself.

1. Life is a first-person story. Everyone makes decisions from their point of view and the place that they are in at that point in time. It’s so easy to point fingers and be judgemental, but at the core of this it’s important to remember that we all see life through our own eyes. We don’t really know everyone’s story or the reasoning behind other people’s behaviour and choices. Be kind.

2. Appreciation is key. It’s not always easy, but to be grateful for your experiences are important for your wellbeing. There is always something to learn and with time, reflection and the right focus you will come to see that. Appreciate the little things if you find the bigger things hard at first. The more you are grateful for, the more you get to be grateful for. Personally I’ve got a whole notebook dedicated to gratefulness.

3. There will always be people who don’t wish you well. Solution: bye.

4. Mistakes are to be made. We need chaos to know order, like we need sadness to know what it’s truly like to be happy. Mistakes are to be made, but don’t ever let them define you as a person. You MAKE mistakes, you’re not A mistake. An important difference.

5. An accident rarely arrive in ones. When shit hits the fan is usually a shitfest. Breathe.

6. The people who truly love you will always have your back. The best thing about the worst time of your life is that you get to see people’s true colours. (Ref nr.3)

7. Always trust yourself. You’re eyes are easily blinded, but your gut feeling knows. Always.

8. Letting go is the ultimate freedom.

9. If it cost you peace of mind, the price is to high. (Ref nr.8)

10. Change is inescapable. You can choose to make it painful or you can welcome it and the joy it can bring in to your life, either way it is bound to happen.

I’ll round it off with the ultimate life advice:

don’t let anyone talk you out of it.

Thank you for stopping by.

x

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4 Life-changing books

Standing still in life is not a desired place to be. Often I think we don’t even know where we want to be due to the constant external influence we suck up on a every day basis. Now, I am both a introverted and a quiet person, which means I spend much time inside the space of my own mind – even when surrounded by many people. This space used to be filled with insecurities, criticism and a whole lot of negativity. That’s no way to move forward, let me tell you. Did you know that we think the same negative thoughts 80% of the day? The same, useless thoughts. What happens when we allow them to flourish? They keep coming back. Curious by nature and a keen reader, I started to pick books for self-awareness and that’s one of the best decisions I ever made. No one gives us this information, you have to be a seeker, which is my theory why so many get into mindfulness these days – but mindfulness is really just a fancy word for awareness and you don’t need to empty your head on the back of a virgin unicorn to have clarity in your life. So, since I’ve read a lot, listened to dozens of books and been a keen seeker for a long time I’ve decided to share my favourites with you.

The key element all these books have in common, and I want to point out that they are very different, is that complication and negativity are unneeded, excessive patterns that we can deal with in an easy, non energy draining way. Reading these will not make you mindful, but you might learn something that takes you in the right direction. Something that takes you away from this:

And towards a more fulfilling life experience.

I’m on round two of The joy of living and I return to The desire map often. Quiet I have heard one time (and it’s really good if you are introverted, but everyone has something to learn). The energy bus is the most simple, good feeling story with a wonderful message – I’ve heard that one a couple of times as well. All of these books is not a onetime read. It’s enjoyment, learning, practice and rereading. It’s books that will give you new impulses every time. Often we overcomplicate things, a lot of things, and there is really no need for that. All we really want is happiness, right?

These books have really made a difference to my life and I hope they can do the same for you – if you are willing. So enjoy and please let me know what you think of you go ahead with it 🙂

x

Personal

A personal journey: The story I wouldn’t share and my most vulnerable moments.

You’re stuck and everything you want is sitting right there in front of you, out of reach.. you crave change with an unsatisfactory hunger and the only thing between you and what you want is your minds limits. I broke it. I took it. All at once.

These last few months have brought massive change for me. It all started a couple of years ago when my long term relationship broke in a very ugly way and my whole world crushed in to a million pieces. Not because of the relationship itself, but because all I thought to be true – like friends and the revelation of characters that I had been surrounding myself with – turned out to be as fake as a three dollar bill. I’m not going to paint myself as a saint here, because I wasn’t, but I find it extremely fascinating how flawed individuals can take the moral high ground in other people’s lives like they’ve never stained themselves. It’s fascinating how morally superior some suddenly get, even knowing that their sheet isn’t clean at all. When fingers are pointed at your flaws and they actually mirror their own. Fascinating. Anyway, I did a massive relations clean out and the time following was very uneasy with a lot of noise from my past life. A vendetta actually. At the very same time I started a new relationship, new relations, a new job and I moved houses. It took my attention away from the noise and I got to refocus, heal a little and grow. I’m very grateful to all the people who were there for me in this time of massive disappointment, grief and heartache. Thank you.

In this time I also distracted myself enough to leave some stuff unhealed, which later came back to haunt me. You see, a few moths ago it all tipped over. Ten years in a bad relationship with both a bad beginning, middle and end, the cruelty of friends I trusted, those who did nothing (and I mean nothing! Which is almost worse) and the pattern of me waiting for others to come around. Adjusting. Hoping for the hopeless. Putting myself a side. I was angry, massively angry and completely done with dancing to anyone else’s tune. I developed severe anxiety. I was depressed. I was down for the count. I think I wore the same t-shirt for weeks.. and I didn’t leave the house. Again, I’m very grateful to you who were there for me and took care of me in this time when I wasn’t capable myself.

I am still not completely where I want to be and I am still healing, but I did decide to make some changes. I did draw my ideal life and I have reached almost every single intention in my desire map. People get surprised over my decision making in this time of need and healing, but to be honest the timing has never been better. Things have never been clearer and I have never been more determined than I am in this moment of time. I started travelling again. I started writing again. Working out again. Painting. I bought a home. I (we) broke off my relationship (we are still friends and I will hold him close to my heart forever, he saved me in many ways and I love him dearly). The difference this time is that all of this is not a distraction, it’s with clarity and intent from my hearts desire. I learned from my downfall what really mattered to me and that soulfood and intentions are more important than any ideal presented from the outside world. And to be honest; it feels both scary as hell and wonderful at the same time, but most importantly it feels right. Even if some of it hurts.

If there is one thing I’ve learned from all of this it is that: Growth is painful. Change is painful. But nothing is as painful as being stuck somewhere you don’t belong.

Thank you for reading.

x

Personal

Goal digger.

Today is a great milestone for me. Today is the day I get the keys to the apartment I bought some time ago and to be honest it feels effing good. There is one habit I’ve learned and kept, and that is to reschedule and feel my life goals from time to time. I review them and take time to reflect appreciation and gratefulness for the things I have achieved and to picture my dream-life for the time to come.  This is one of the big ones. An apartment own fully by me, and only me – and the bank of course. This one is the impossible made possible. It also reminds me that the work I do with myself every day has such importance in how I achieve my goals. And how fast I get from A to B.

My life wasn’t always on track, even if it might have seemed that way to the outside world. A few years ago my life got turned upside down. Everything I knew was pulled from under my feet and I was forced to rethink my life completely. This made me realize that I had been living my life in regards to what was expected of me: from my social relations, from society, how I myself and how others thought I ought to live it. Not how I wanted to live it. The truth is that loosing everything gave my life meaning and was the greatest gift I ever received. It was a revelation that changed my view on what life has to give and how we go about to get it. I wasn’t happy and I didn’t even know it. Most of us go about every day the same and we forget this precious gift of life that we are given. I often think of this when I view this picture from my trip to San Francisco:

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Get in that little yellow, vulnerable car and learn how to drive in the traffic of life. I had no clue what I was doing, but I sure as hell learned how to drive – and enjoy it!

Today is one of those days where I am super grateful for everything that life threw at me, no matter good or bad. Everything shapes us and it’s your choice if it’s for the better.

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Life is a gift, wake up every day and realize that.