Personal

The existential crises of a seeker.

There are probably various understandings and definitions of “the seeker”, perhaps as many perceptions as humans, but in the end I’m sure we can agree that “the seeker” is a curious being that never stops his/hers search.

I am a seeker. I question everything. As amusing as that may sound, it’s sometimes what I would define as my own personal hell. For a good while now I’ve found myself in a existential crises. You must understand that the question relating to my existence has always been a subject to my mind, but this crises moved it up to the top of my every day self communication.

“What’s the meaning of my life?”

“What do I want in life?”

“Who do I want to be?”

..Are questions that repeat themselves daily. These are all relevant questions that I’m sure we all ask ourselves at some point, but this is driving me crazy. I know that I am not content with the life I am currently living. I want more. There must be more. I don’t mean materialistic things, I mean soul food. Fulfilment. A bigger sensation within myself.

I’ve been through endless books, podcasts and what ever source available to find the answers to these questions – not in a direct manner, but to find patterns and methods for how to move along and find to a more fulfilling place in myself. Some are helpful, some are not. Some inspire me and some just build up frustration. I’ve gotten to a point where I know I have to change the foundation of how I live my life and I know where I want to be (or don’t want to be), I just don’t know how to get there or what I want to do. And it’s paralysing. It’s like trying to find a needle in a dark, unknown room. Where do one start?

In the back of my mind I hear the echoes of unnamed souls who whisper “you’re 30 now, settle down”. Ugh. If you had any remote idea of how painfully untraditional I am at the core of my being, even just suggesting to whisper those words would make you shutter. It actually makes me feel very alone in this world when close relations don’t grasp the fact that we don’t view life’s fruits the same way. The lack of acceptance for a different world view. I mean, I’m ok with both viewing life differently and the fact (as mentioned in an earlier post) that we are alone in this life, but the distance is greater when the acceptance isn’t returned. I am truly happy for everyone who found their happiness and fulfilment with in the social code and values of their society, truly. I’m just not one of you.

So now what? Well, I came to a realisation earlier today while meditating. I’ve forgotten what I enjoyed as a child. I don’t know what I like anymore. To know what I like and want, I must do new things. Right? The answer is so easy that is almost painful that it took me so long to figure out. I felt like that time I tried to figure out my MacBook for the first time: so simple it makes you feel stupid. So here’s to trying new things! Now, don’t get me wrong, it’s not the answer to my existents or necessarily my crises, but I do welcome and appreciate any form of movement into my life.

I don’t think I am alone in this problem. How many of us truly knows the intention and motive of how we go about our daily life? Do you ever ask yourself why you do what you do? Do you truly do it for your own happiness or do you live your life from the outside looking in? I mean, what defines success for instance? Is it to reach a state of life where you as a being is fulfilled or is it a state of life where you are glorified by others? We live in a society where we live parts of our life’s so openly and it’s so set by the reactions of others. You know, what is given can always be as easily taken away. I don’t mean that we’re not depended on each other, I mean that there is a difference in our intentions from what we do. I know, for me this is true, that no one else can ever make me truly happy. I can find someone to compliment my life and happiness, but no one can ever be my happiness. That is a recipe for disaster. The same goes for my way of life. I can not depend on the confirmation of others to show me my path of life – then it isn’t really my life I am living is it?

I could go on about this subject for hours, but I’m going to cut it short here and go back to my Sunday brooding and seeking. If you have any good suggestions to new and fun things to try, please don’t hesitate to leave a comment. It’s very much welcomed.

Have a lovely Sunday.

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How does it work, Personal

Test: The viral Sand and Sky face mask – does it actually work?

As a flawed human being I am not immune to good marketing. The amount of time we spend on social media makes it a perfect place to trick our easily convinced minds and it’s not lacking of products that will miraculously change your life. Ok, an overstatement – but you get the idea. So, for the last couple of months I’ve found myself adding all kinds of shit to my shopping basket and clicking the corner x, but then it happened.. I went on and got the Sand&Sky miracle pink clay mask, made from unicorn poo on mars.

I will point out that I’m no stranger to skin care and because I’m no longer in my twenties I take that shit seriously. I’ve tried pretty much everything there is and I settled for products that actually works for me. With that said I’m always curious to new market entries for that little extra shabam and Oh man is that usually a call for disappointment.

So let’s get on to the point: Does Sand&Sky live up to the hype?

If you wonder, yes I LOVE robes. Robes is life. What I do not love is Sand&Sky. Watch the video to find out why.

Conclusion: spend your money elsewhere.

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Personal

The 10 most important things I’ve learned throughout my life.

Life is all about lessons. We learn as long as we live. It’s the core of how we stay in movement, develop and unfold ourselves. I find myself grateful for every decision I’ve made, it’s consequences and the lessons that I’ve learned from them – both good and bad. It’s what has taken me on the path I am today. Some stick deeper then others of course, but I wanted to share the 10 most important things I’ve learned in life so far and maybe you will recognise some of these lessons yourself.

1. Life is a first-person story. Everyone makes decisions from their point of view and the place that they are in at that point in time. It’s so easy to point fingers and be judgemental, but at the core of this it’s important to remember that we all see life through our own eyes. We don’t really know everyone’s story or the reasoning behind other people’s behaviour and choices. Be kind.

2. Appreciation is key. It’s not always easy, but to be grateful for your experiences are important for your wellbeing. There is always something to learn and with time, reflection and the right focus you will come to see that. Appreciate the little things if you find the bigger things hard at first. The more you are grateful for, the more you get to be grateful for. Personally I’ve got a whole notebook dedicated to gratefulness.

3. There will always be people who don’t wish you well. Solution: bye.

4. Mistakes are to be made. We need chaos to know order, like we need sadness to know what it’s truly like to be happy. Mistakes are to be made, but don’t ever let them define you as a person. You MAKE mistakes, you’re not A mistake. An important difference.

5. An accident rarely arrive in ones. When shit hits the fan is usually a shitfest. Breathe.

6. The people who truly love you will always have your back. The best thing about the worst time of your life is that you get to see people’s true colours. (Ref nr.3)

7. Always trust yourself. You’re eyes are easily blinded, but your gut feeling knows. Always.

8. Letting go is the ultimate freedom.

9. If it cost you peace of mind, the price is to high. (Ref nr.8)

10. Change is inescapable. You can choose to make it painful or you can welcome it and the joy it can bring in to your life, either way it is bound to happen.

I’ll round it off with the ultimate life advice:

don’t let anyone talk you out of it.

Thank you for stopping by.

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Personal

4 Life-changing books

Standing still in life is not a desired place to be. Often I think we don’t even know where we want to be due to the constant external influence we suck up on a every day basis. Now, I am both a introverted and a quiet person, which means I spend much time inside the space of my own mind – even when surrounded by many people. This space used to be filled with insecurities, criticism and a whole lot of negativity. That’s no way to move forward, let me tell you. Did you know that we think the same negative thoughts 80% of the day? The same, useless thoughts. What happens when we allow them to flourish? They keep coming back. Curious by nature and a keen reader, I started to pick books for self-awareness and that’s one of the best decisions I ever made. No one gives us this information, you have to be a seeker, which is my theory why so many get into mindfulness these days – but mindfulness is really just a fancy word for awareness and you don’t need to empty your head on the back of a virgin unicorn to have clarity in your life. So, since I’ve read a lot, listened to dozens of books and been a keen seeker for a long time I’ve decided to share my favourites with you.

The key element all these books have in common, and I want to point out that they are very different, is that complication and negativity are unneeded, excessive patterns that we can deal with in an easy, non energy draining way. Reading these will not make you mindful, but you might learn something that takes you in the right direction. Something that takes you away from this:

And towards a more fulfilling life experience.

I’m on round two of The joy of living and I return to The desire map often. Quiet I have heard one time (and it’s really good if you are introverted, but everyone has something to learn). The energy bus is the most simple, good feeling story with a wonderful message – I’ve heard that one a couple of times as well. All of these books is not a onetime read. It’s enjoyment, learning, practice and rereading. It’s books that will give you new impulses every time. Often we overcomplicate things, a lot of things, and there is really no need for that. All we really want is happiness, right?

These books have really made a difference to my life and I hope they can do the same for you – if you are willing. So enjoy and please let me know what you think of you go ahead with it 🙂

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Personal

Things aren’t always as they seem: 5 lessons I’ve learned in life and how I cope with anxiety.

You might not know this about me, but I suffer from anxiety. It’s not life threatening or something that I deal with every day, but I have moments and periods of time where I really have to work myself out of mental situations which are very challenging. It hasn’t always been so or been this severe, and it’s not something that I’ve shared with many people, but it is a part of my reality. Today is one of those days. These past days have presented a number of challenges to me and even though I have a positive mindset towards them and see a number of possibilities that I am excited about, I do get small cracks that in the end puts my physical and mental state in a sort of hibernation. It’s these days I struggle to get out of bed and to bring my energy up to a level where I can push myself out the door and into a (un)comfortable situation to get over it. I’ve accepted this part of me and I don’t dwell to much over it. And even though this has nothing to do with other people, I thought I’d share some life lessons with you that’s made this acceptable to me and how I cope.

Lesson 1: People see what they want to see.

No matter how much you share or the amount of work you put into your success and failures, people choose to see what they want to see – or believe your story from other’s lips. Somehow I think this is a result of others lack and their denial to face it rather than about you, and that’s OK, but it’s not something you need too deal with.

Lesson 2: Be a scissor, cut bad energy out of your life.

Remove those people from your life. In my case, some of them removed themselves and what a blessing! Spend your time with people who genuinely wishes you the best and cheers you on. Once you notice the difference, you will never bat an eye or hesitate again.

Lesson 3: You are not obligated to do anything. Loose that word from your vocabulary.

You choose what you want and don’t want to do. You are not obligated to do anything. It’s your choice and there is power in that.

Lesson 4:  You are alone.

We come into this world alone and we leave it alone. We are alone in our feelings, our mind and in our body.  I don’t mean loneliness in this case, it’s simply a fact of life and the sooner we realize this – the sooner we can work on our relationship with ourselves.

Lesson 5: Be fearless.

This might sound weird, but even though I suffer from anxiety I try to be as fearless as possible. I do things, go places and try new stuff all the time, especially those things that scare me a bit. Why? Because it’s inspiring,  it makes me grow and gives me good pieces of reflection that move me forward in this life. To be stuck is not to live and if you’ve never failed- you’ve never challenged yourself.

I’m not saying any of this is easy, because if it was we would all live wonderful, fulfilling lives all the time. I’m not gonna say that my anxiety is a blessing either, but it sure is something that I made a conscious choice to use as a tool to push myself. I have days where it’s absolutely inhibitory, but most often it’s a reminder to, as Taylor Swift put so perfectly;”shake it off” and go do something challenging. I know there are people out there who think that everything just comes so easily to me and that my life if a garden of blooming flowers all the time, but this simply isn’t the case.

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So there you go. Things aren’t always as they seem. I wish you a wonderful Saturday wherever you are and I myself are gonna shake it off and get out of my PJ’s.

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