Personal, Travel

Your heart beats in my chest.

I’m quite hungover today, I will admit, because I went out dancing with one of my girlfriends last night – but despite that (headache stripped out) this day started out so lovely!

During my last trip to LA I met my soulmate. Or a kindred spirit if you will. My twin soul. She is one of the most amazing people I’ve ever met walking this earth and we had an instant connection. In her words put so beautifully:

your heart beats in my chest

I’ve thought about her a lot lately and today we finally, despite the time difference, had the joy of spending one and a half hour on the phone together. God I miss her. She has the gift of filling my soul with unconditional love and appreciation in an instant. I cannot describe how it works, but I think if you’ve ever experienced a kindred spirit you can relate. I mean, you just know – you know?

I’ve had a lot going on on my mental plane lately and it is curious how all of that just makes sense, how the priority shifts and how it’s all just ok – unimportant even – the minute this connection is nurtured. I mean, this girl is seriously smart, reflected and caring as well, she’s a fucking unicorn. But the best thing is that she’s my unicorn and even if it is hours ago this phone conversation took place I’m so at peace right now.

I really just wanted to share my gratitude with you today and I am curious if any of you out there ever have had the pleasure of your kindred spirit? I wish everyone could have this experience, because it’s so fulfilling and beautiful.

Anyway I’m attaching my countdown until I meet my lovely lady again and wish you a happy Wednesday.

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Personal

The twinkle in our eyes.

The world is full of magic things, waiting for our senses to grow sharper.

..But somewhere along the way they weakened. When did we stop viewing the world with amazement and stars in our eyes?

I’ve spent a good amount of time with my nephew lately. He is very new to this world and everything is a beautiful mystery to him. I see the twinkle in his eyes when he discovers a new sound or something as simple and common as a leaf on the pavement. He gets so excited and explodes from the joy of sharing it. It makes me wonder… when do we forget the magic of the world? When is it that we are to busy and occupied to see the beauty right in front of us? The joy of simple enjoyment and to get excited about life for the purpose of life itself?

Now, this is a generalisation of course, I know there to be creative, joyful souls out there who brings delight to us through their stories, music and art every single day. It’s when I look at people from my window seat at a cafe, the bus ride to work or simply at instagram that I loose faith. Can we even be more alike? It’s the importance of being busy, accurate, socially correct, materialistically successful, feigned and like everyone else that makes me feel and live the contrast to the genuinely happy spirit of my nephew.

It makes me sad that we somewhere a long the way loose our childlike spirit and get groomed into depressing adults chasing trophies for others to admire – like we really care. What’s the importance? And why do we care so much about other people’s admiration?

It’s not to be admired that gives true happiness. It is to admire the greater and the most simple things in this world and in life.

I for one am gonna let my nephews enthusiasm rub off on me as long as I can.

I’ll start by enjoying these covers against my skin and stretch out in bed – just because I can!

Truly enjoy your Saturday ❤

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Personal

Horsing around

The day finally came: I got back on the horse! Horses was my favourite activity as a child and I took it very seriously. It’s ridiculous that I’ve waited twenty years to get back into it.

Martine and I contacted a Horse Center close to us and was given the opportunity to come by for a ride – and make it more permanent, which we will. But my god I am rusty! I need to read up, practice and get back into the whole deal, because there’s a lot of things to think about while handling a horse. I was very happy that I was given such a beautiful gelding, I could not have asked for a better horse. His name is Neptun and he put his head on my chest during our grooming session, which was such a beautiful moment. He is a Polski Konik and a very kind man – even if he takes every opportunity to ravish every bush in his way.

It took a while for me to get into the rhythm of Neptun and get comfortable, but now all I can think about is our next ride. I’m completely in love with riding all over again and just the smell of the stables brought back a flash of memories. I’m so glad that I have Martine to share this with and that we both enjoyed ourselves so much!

I’m definitely back to my childhood wish of getting a horse now and have decided that I will – when I’ve decided where I want to settle down in the future. Horses are such beautiful animals with the most amazing souls. Just being around them makes me immensely happy and calm.

I guess we can round this up to mission successful. One step closer to a long lost passion.

I hope you have an amazing Friday as well and all the best wishes for your weekend. Thank you for stopping by.

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Personal

Murder fantasies

Not a normal headline, I know, but I’m pretty sure we all have times in our lives when murder fantasies makes their appearances. I see myself as a fairly zen person, but every now and again when someone or something makes my blood boil from the inside – all I can do is kill them in the worst possible way in my head.

It doesn’t feel like much in the moment, but man it helps to imaginary kill someone. All the anger and frustration – and the satisfaction. More the latter actually.

I’m standing in the middle of a case which I cannot talk about openly at the moment, but I really look forward to sharing the absurd reality of this with you in the future. Until then I’m gonna continue applying some of my well studied torture methods imaginary

I hope your day is more blissful than mine.

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Personal

Rediscovering my soul’s desires.

I’ve started a new journey. A journey of rediscovering the things that set my soul on fire. I didn’t realise, but there are so many things I stopped doing for no particular reason. After this Sunday’s brooding I came to the conclusion that I need to map out what I enjoyed doing as a child, as well as an adult, cross reference them and do something about it.

This took me days and a lot of research, but in the end I have a booked list of things I’ve got up and coming (and some I already started):

Yinyoga

It’s the most mentally and physically cleansing thing I can do to myself. I enjoy how the pain empties my mind completely and takes me to a higher place of relaxation.

Horseback riding

I used to LOVE horses. In fact that was my main hobby for years and you would always find me in the stables. Unfortunately we moved to a place that didn’t offer anything like it and that put a natural end to it. I’m pretty sure I would have been riding full time in some sort of horse sport if I had stayed on it, so now I’m going back to the basics. Also, horses are my favourite spirit animal.

One year writing course

Yep. I’m doing it. I love to write and I have the intention to have a book published before I die. Therefor I am signing up to a writers course to get some development and new skills. I am super excited about this and can’t wait to start!

This is my list for now and I’m excited to keep you updated as I go along. But first I’m taking a weekend trip with my friend Martine and thirty other people to this years pike fishing competition. It’s gonna be a party, so if you wanna know how Norwegians behave in the countryside please don’t hesitate to follow my instagram – I’ll post stories throughout the weekend.

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Personal

The existential crises of a seeker.

There are probably various understandings and definitions of “the seeker”, perhaps as many perceptions as humans, but in the end I’m sure we can agree that “the seeker” is a curious being that never stops his/hers search.

I am a seeker. I question everything. As amusing as that may sound, it’s sometimes what I would define as my own personal hell. For a good while now I’ve found myself in a existential crises. You must understand that the question relating to my existence has always been a subject to my mind, but this crises moved it up to the top of my every day self communication.

“What’s the meaning of my life?”

“What do I want in life?”

“Who do I want to be?”

..Are questions that repeat themselves daily. These are all relevant questions that I’m sure we all ask ourselves at some point, but this is driving me crazy. I know that I am not content with the life I am currently living. I want more. There must be more. I don’t mean materialistic things, I mean soul food. Fulfilment. A bigger sensation within myself.

I’ve been through endless books, podcasts and what ever source available to find the answers to these questions – not in a direct manner, but to find patterns and methods for how to move along and find to a more fulfilling place in myself. Some are helpful, some are not. Some inspire me and some just build up frustration. I’ve gotten to a point where I know I have to change the foundation of how I live my life and I know where I want to be (or don’t want to be), I just don’t know how to get there or what I want to do. And it’s paralysing. It’s like trying to find a needle in a dark, unknown room. Where do one start?

In the back of my mind I hear the echoes of unnamed souls who whisper “you’re 30 now, settle down”. Ugh. If you had any remote idea of how painfully untraditional I am at the core of my being, even just suggesting to whisper those words would make you shutter. It actually makes me feel very alone in this world when close relations don’t grasp the fact that we don’t view life’s fruits the same way. The lack of acceptance for a different world view. I mean, I’m ok with both viewing life differently and the fact (as mentioned in an earlier post) that we are alone in this life, but the distance is greater when the acceptance isn’t returned. I am truly happy for everyone who found their happiness and fulfilment with in the social code and values of their society, truly. I’m just not one of you.

So now what? Well, I came to a realisation earlier today while meditating. I’ve forgotten what I enjoyed as a child. I don’t know what I like anymore. To know what I like and want, I must do new things. Right? The answer is so easy that is almost painful that it took me so long to figure out. I felt like that time I tried to figure out my MacBook for the first time: so simple it makes you feel stupid. So here’s to trying new things! Now, don’t get me wrong, it’s not the answer to my existents or necessarily my crises, but I do welcome and appreciate any form of movement into my life.

I don’t think I am alone in this problem. How many of us truly knows the intention and motive of how we go about our daily life? Do you ever ask yourself why you do what you do? Do you truly do it for your own happiness or do you live your life from the outside looking in? I mean, what defines success for instance? Is it to reach a state of life where you as a being is fulfilled or is it a state of life where you are glorified by others? We live in a society where we live parts of our life’s so openly and it’s so set by the reactions of others. You know, what is given can always be as easily taken away. I don’t mean that we’re not depended on each other, I mean that there is a difference in our intentions from what we do. I know, for me this is true, that no one else can ever make me truly happy. I can find someone to compliment my life and happiness, but no one can ever be my happiness. That is a recipe for disaster. The same goes for my way of life. I can not depend on the confirmation of others to show me my path of life – then it isn’t really my life I am living is it?

I could go on about this subject for hours, but I’m going to cut it short here and go back to my Sunday brooding and seeking. If you have any good suggestions to new and fun things to try, please don’t hesitate to leave a comment. It’s very much welcomed.

Have a lovely Sunday.

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How does it work, Personal

Test: The viral Sand and Sky face mask – does it actually work?

As a flawed human being I am not immune to good marketing. The amount of time we spend on social media makes it a perfect place to trick our easily convinced minds and it’s not lacking of products that will miraculously change your life. Ok, an overstatement – but you get the idea. So, for the last couple of months I’ve found myself adding all kinds of shit to my shopping basket and clicking the corner x, but then it happened.. I went on and got the Sand&Sky miracle pink clay mask, made from unicorn poo on mars.

I will point out that I’m no stranger to skin care and because I’m no longer in my twenties I take that shit seriously. I’ve tried pretty much everything there is and I settled for products that actually works for me. With that said I’m always curious to new market entries for that little extra shabam and Oh man is that usually a call for disappointment.

So let’s get on to the point: Does Sand&Sky live up to the hype?

If you wonder, yes I LOVE robes. Robes is life. What I do not love is Sand&Sky. Watch the video to find out why.

Conclusion: spend your money elsewhere.

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