Welcome back to my blog, reader. I appreciate that you take time out of your day to sit down and read my posts. I know everything about having a busy schedule (especially since I started writing my book) and I therefor don’t want to horde your time without purpose. Today I want to share some simple questions you can ask yourself to discover or reorganise your value system – So lets look at values and lets jump right in!
Values are defined as:
«Principles or standards of behavior: one’s judgement of what is important in life».
Our values are our guidance-system in life: how we treat ourselves, how we meet others, how we set goals and how we reach goals – basically what we give a fuck about, why and how we deal with it. I don’t know about you, but I sure free-styled my value system for a long time, which pretty much resulted in me being burned out and making tons of unnecessary mistakes. It wasn’t until I stared to ask myself these following questions that I reshaped the way I approached and live my life:
- What is important to me?
Success has always been at the top of this iceberg, so I will go with this as an example. So fair enough, simple answer: Success. The challenge occurred when I had to define why and what success actually meant to me. Why the heck was I so obsessed with this? Eventually I came to the horror of a conclusion that I defined success as a measurement for other peoples admiration of me. Now, how the f*** am I supposed to go through life pleasing people? Pleasing more than one person is exhausting because people do have different opinions. And the one person that is important to please is me. So questions number to and three are:
2. Why is this important to me?
3. Who has control over my state of mind in this case? (Are my reasons grounded in myself or outside myself?)
If the answer to question number three is anyone but yourself: Get rid of it and find a new value or dig deeper for your meaning. In my case success is enjoying every journey and path in my life regardless. Let me just point out that that doesn’t free me from hardship or bad days, it makes me handle my hardships and bad days in a totally different way. Success to me is happiness. My happiness. Lets move on to the forth and last question:
4. What is the standard to (enforcing) my value?
This question is crucial to maintain your system, because its your recipe for how to handle any given situation when enforcing your values (which is every day). My standard for success is to be honest with myself and to say yes/no to paths in my life. Yes to those that I truly want and no to the ones that I don’t want – not because it is convenient or because I fear being disliked if I say no.
Now, I want to make it clear that happiness and success are deeper evaluated values than I make them out to be here, but because I don’t want to make this post endless and that I want to make a point of the questions – we’ll just have to survive that for now.
I hope this is helpful to you and please don’t be afraid to leave a comment or a question 🙂
Happy Monday, dear reader.